Self-confidence is something elusive. Just when I think I have plenty of it, one comment can pull me down. Then I think I shouldn't have been so confident in the first place. Like maybe I was too prideful. But the thing is, confidence is the proof of what makes us believe in ourselves. When we learn that we are good at somehting, we can begin to excell in that thing. I think this is good, but it's also tricky.

I believe it's good to build self-confidence. I think being self-confident helps us show up as our best self. The voice that comes and tells us that we shouldn't be that confident is our old lizard brain, trying to stop us from evolving, from being our best self.

Today I want to share with you how you can be more self-confident. It is very simple, but not always so easy to do. I listened to a couple of Brooke Castillo's podcasts on self-confidence and I wanted to share my insites.

What is self-confidence

  1. self-assurance
  2. self-appreciation
  3. self-love

When you look up the definition of self-confidence it says, a feeling of trust in one's abilities, qualities, and judgement. Self-confidence is something everyone wants but not everyone is actively creating. Think about that for a minute.

Why do you want to feel self-confident? Is it because you want to have some sort of control over the way others see you? I want to feel self-confident because it makes me feel good. It puts me in a happy state of being and I feel great. I feel very able. I know I can do what I'm about to do. There is no fear of failure.

This is a feeling of self-assurance. But I also think that you need self-appreciation too. I think self-appreciation is knowing that we are all human. I'm awesome because I'm me and I can't take credit for it. This is also knowing that you are awesome too, and you can't take credit for it. Everyone is worthy; no one is better than anyone else.

That my friends is self-love. Without self-love, self-appreciation, and self-assurance, it's going to be really difficult to build self-confidence.


Why you need self-confidence

  1. to accomplish goals
  2. to overcome adversity
  3. to be resilient

Self-confidence generates positive action. You need it to accomplish your goals. When you set a goal, you have no guarantee that you will be successful. But if you go after your goal with confidence, the chances of you accomplishing your goal are way greater. It is because you believe in yourself. 

You need this belief to overcome adversity. When you set a goal and the going gets tough, you have to keep your eye on where you want to be. Of course things are going to come up. The doubt. The challenges. The set-backs. They are supposed to come up. It's part of the process. If you keep your belief in yourself, if you stay self-confident that you can and you will meet your goal, you will get there, no matter what your results show in the beginning.

This self-confidence is what generates your resilience. Brooke says that the only thing holding you back is your belief about what you're capable of doing. If you want to keep going, you need to practice believing in yourself to build your self-confidence.

Before you know it, your very resilience is what will help you overcome adversity and accomplish your goals. All because you have self-confidence.

how to grow self-confidence

  1. know yourself
  2. be willing to risk rejection
  3. believe and trust in you
  4. manage your mind

So, you know what self-confidence is; your trust in your abilities. You know you need it to accomplish your goals. Now, how do you get it?

The very first thing you need to do is to get to know yourself. What is your opinion of yourself? Because your opinion of yourself is what determines your confidence. 

And I'm not talking about being arrogant. Arrogant people think they are better than everyone else. Remember that talk about self-love above? We are all human. You have to believe that you are worthy.

Self-confidence comes from your brain. You need to like yourself first, before you expect anyone else to like you. Love yourself. Respect yourself. It's in your thinking. Think nice to yourself.

The second thing you need to do is that you need to be willing to risk rejection. It's okay if people don't like you. It's okay if you pitch your product and nobody is as excited as you are. It's okay if there are no questions at the end of your presentation. 

You don't want to rely on your skill or your talents to produce confidence. You have to believe in your ability to develop the talent. You need to have self-confidence before you become successful. You need to take action, fail, learn, and take action again. Brooke says to have self-confidence in your ability to get the ability. Have faith in your ability to learn what you need to know. 

That was the third thing, believe and trust in yourself. The fourth thing you need to grow self-confidence is to manage your mind. I love how Brooke says, 'all you have to do is to manage your mind to create different results', like it's super easy.

I'm telling you, it's not always easy. But it is that simple. The only thing you need to grow self-confidence is your belief that you can handle any emotion. If you are willing to feel any emotion, you can blow your own mind with your confidence.

That my friends, is what I want you to do.

Confident people are powerful and contagous. You can be one of those people. Open yourself to your abundance and feel self-confident. Know that we are all equal and whatever confidence you admire in someone else is available to you right now.

Get it.

If you want to take this even further, I created a Grow Your Self-Confidence worksheet for you. It's in the members only Resource Library. Not a member? Join here. It's free!