How To Really Love Your Home
This is an old post that I updated.
Most people love being home. Think of that comfortable feeling you get when you walk through the door of your own home after you have been gone for a long period of time. Home at last. You may love being home, but do you really love your home?
For a long time I didn't really love my home. I appreciated it, sure. Especially after a trip away from home with the whole family staying in one bedroom. What I wanted was to really love my home all the time, not only after being gone.
decide to love your home
If you want to really love your home, the first thing you need to do is to decide to love it. You need that compelling reason, so decide on purpose that you are going to love your home, no matter what. It doesn't matter if it is tiny. It doesn't matter if it's a rental. It doesn't matter if it's so big you can't keep up with the cleaning. Decide that you want to love your home.
Put yourself in an abundance mindset by looking to your past to see how far you've come. Is having a home something you have always wanted? Sometimes we forget to appreciate the things we have. We can always get better and better, but not until we are truly thankful for what we have been given.
Look at your house and work with what you have. If you need some ideas, get some books from the library or even just google your house style. What do you like that other people are doing with what you have?
This is all your mindset. Remember that your house isn't supposed to make you happy. That's your job. If you can make yourself happy, you can be happy anywhere. Decide to love your home because it feels better to love where you live than to not.
I changed my mind set from getting out of this old house to really making it reflect who we are and loving it. You have to want to love your home, or it isn't going to happen.
know your style
If you want to love your home, you're going to want it to reflect who you are. Not only your personality, but those who live with you also. If everyone loves the home and is comfortable, days will be that much nicer.
This doesn't have to mean taking on a whole renovation. Just knowing what you like and what you want is going to be a huge step. I don't even think you need to pick a style in the traditional sense like modern farmhouse or shabby chic or bohemian or contemporary or minimalism. That list goes on and on and overlaps anyway.
Know what you like. What resonates with you. Mix your antiques with your IKEA pieces if that is what you love. The point is to love it, and if you love it, it's going to reflect you.
Then once you know what you like, you can start making your house look like that. Remember to keep it realistic to your family. My style definitely is more minimalist, but with kids around, there are still plenty of toys. Our time with our kids at home is really such a short time. Remember this when you are thinking of renovations.
Pay attention to things that make you feel happy and comfortable. When you visit the homes of your friends, or even coffee shops or museums, notice what you are drawn to. Is it the decor? The furnishings? The lighting? When things make you sigh with a relaxed smile or make your heart feel so light, then I think they deserve to be in your home. Imagine feeling so happy and comfortable every time you walk into one of your own rooms.
If you were going to pin something on Pinterest, ask yourself what exactly you are drawn to in each picture. Is it something you could do in your house? Would you do it in your next house? Go from room to room in you house and note the things that you like and dislike.
Remember too that nobody else has to like what you like. Do not decorate your house for someone else. You are the one who lives there. Make it reflect you.
One thing that has been huge for me is just clearing out junk. I have always thought I was someone who didn't keep a lot of clutter, but somehow, it still piles up. I can't believe how much stuff we accumulate in our everyday lives. It always feels good to clean out. If you can't give something lots of love, let it go.
A big part of my loving my home is having it all organized. Everything needs to have a place so it can be put in its own place. The house will stay organized. This is especially helpful when you have kids. They can actually put things away because there is a place for it.
If you have a room that you can't stand going into because of the clutter and disorganization (sewing room anyone?), schedule a time for you to tackle it. You will be so glad you did. It really doesn't work to only clear off the sewing table. You have to tackle the whole room all at once so the next time you go in there to put something away you will put it away instead of setting it on that sewing table with everything else.
Give yourself time to clean out and organize so you can love your house. Sometimes it's best to do it without the kids around. I did my daughters bedroom while she was at school. (Just be sure to take out the trash before they get home!)
Sometimes taking a picture of a room can help you see what you can do to really love it. I tend to have a very critical eye. I can use this to offer improvements instead of criticism. Sometimes it is easier to see what stands out or what can be added by looking at a picture. Maybe it's just rearranging furniture. Maybe it's raising or lowering wall hangings. Maybe it's the wall color. Maybe there is too much color or too many patterns. Know what you like so you can put it in your home.
I surprised myself by letting go of my kids rooms. They can have their own space. My daughter's room doesn't need to look like a guest room just because she is the one who gets kicked out when we have company. I'm pretty sure the overnight guests we entertain will be fine with this. I moved all her toys in there this summer and she has been so happy in her space. My kids have homemade signs on their doors and their own artwork on their walls. I want to love my space; they want to love theirs.
Go love your home
As you really appreciate your house, your house will appreciate in value. Let your house feel welcoming so when friends come to visit they can see your personality. Let your house reflect who you are.
Learn to love and perfect the process instead of the whole outcome at once. There is something valuable in this. The more work and effort you put into things, the more you appreciate and enjoy them.
Make sure you have at least one thing you can give 5 loves in every room, so when you walk in there, it puts a smile on your face.