How to Experience the Holiday's without Anxiety
Hey friends! Are you ready for the holiday's?!
Today I want to do a quick overview of The Life Coach School's model because this one tool will help you stay sane so you can experience the holiday's without anxiety. That is an option, you know. Thanksgiving and Christmas can be super enjoyable. You don't have to feel stressed. You don't have to feel anxious. You can manage your mind and have the best holiday season ever.
step one| thought download
So if I was feeling anxious about Thanksgiving, the first thing I would do is a thought download. Get out some paper and a pen and write down everything that comes to your mind when you think about Thanksgiving.
What are your thoughts? What are you worried about? What is stressing you out? Write for 5 to 10 minutes without stopping. If you are stopping to think, all those thoughts should be on your paper.
Okay, so now you have your thoughts on paper. It's time to have a look at them. Before you start beating yourself up over your negative thoughts, know that this is part of the process. You will never get to a better feeling place if you don't acknowledge where you're coming from.
step two| identify the problem
Look at your thoughts and identify the main theme. What is the overall problem? And then go a little deeper and get more specific. What is the main thought that is causing the problem? If you can't identify the thought, what is the action you are taking or not taking?
Once you identify the problem, you can categorize it in the model.
step three| categorize the problem
Remember, the model starts with the circumstances at the top. Circumstances are neutral. Next we have thoughts. What is your thought about the circumstance? Next is feelings. When you think that thought, how do you feel? After feelings is action. When you feel that way, what do you do? And lastly, results. When you do that, what do you get?
So, where does your problem fit in the model? Is it a circumstance, thought, feeling, action, or result? Plug it in the model, and fill in the rest of the model based on your problem.
For instance, if my problem was that I didn't want to go anywhere with a new baby because there's too many people, my model could look like this:
C - Thanksgiving Dinner
T - There's going to be too many people.
F - anxious
A - stay home
R - lame Thanksgiving dinner, probably pbj
This first model is what Brooke calls your unintentional model. This is your brain running wild, unsupervised. Now we want to take responsibility and decide how we really want to feel about Thanksgiving dinner with a bunch of people.
step four| find a better thought
This is where a lot of people get tripped up. You have to find a thought that serves you. One that you believe. Because if you don't believe it, you aren't going to take your desired action. So sometimes to help you figure out what thought you want to think you can start with what you want to be doing.
I just want to sit and be comfortable. My new thought is that I don't have to talk to everyone. This makes me feel calm. Let's put it in the model.
C - Thanksgiving Dinner
T - I don't have to talk to everyone.
F - calm
A - go and find a comfortable place to sit and be in my own space. I don't have to mingle.
R - enjoy Thanksgiving dinner
there you have it
If you want to enjoy the holiday's without anxiety, you need to follow these steps. You will blow your mind with how much you can be in control. You always get to decide how you want to feel. Start taking responsibility for your decisions.
Have a stellar Thanksgiving!